Advent is one of my favorite times of the year. No, I do not have one of those countdown to Christmas calendars although those are probably fun. I enjoy the mindfulness and purposeful slowing down to practice the waiting and anticipation for the coming of Jesus. The older I get, the more I enjoy this season.

When I was a young mom, Advent was so hard. We would all get tangled up in the hoopla. I was trying to do the right thing and stem the tide of global consumerism and instead create a willing and thoughtful spirit in my children. What a disaster that was! I couldn’t even find a willing and thoughtful spirit in myself!

As the boys got older, we started making Advent wreaths together and sometimes reading Advent devotions before school. Back when they ate breakfast and stood still for more than 90 seconds, I would light the candles and we would take turns praying over our Eggo waffles and Nutragrain bars. The boys took turns blowing out the candles. It was their favorite part. My oldest called the smoke from the candles, Jesus smoke.

When the boys became too much to corral and school parties and sleep and presents and parades and tree lightings and so on began to take over our lives, I began celebrating Advent on my own. I would deliver everyone to school and on days that I didn’t go straight to work, I would come home and enjoy a cup of tea and my Advent devotion. It was a very peaceful moment for me in a not so peaceful time.

I also enjoy Advent because I am not a daily Bible reader (gasp, the shame). I find that I need an end goal for my Bible reading. Group studies often help me there. But daily quiet time with the Almighty is harder for me than one would think. Advent offers that time for me. I know over the next 24 days, I will specifically make time to sit with this year’s devotion of choice, read a little bit, ponder, write, and pray. I am so looking forward to the discipline. I don’t know why I cannot carry that over into my daily life, but I have never been successful at doing so outside of a group study. (I also do a self study at Lent, but that’s another post for another day).

Recently I was catching up with Sarah Bessey’s blog and her thoughts on Advent. I liked what she had to say about joy:

The joy born out of suffering and longing is more beautiful for its very complexity…. joy doesn’t erase the longing and the sadness that came before but it does redeem it, it may even stain backwards changing how we look at those days or years. But the joy is made more real, richer and deeper perhaps, because we longed for it with all our hearts for so many days.

SaraH Bessey, Advent is for the ones who know longing, Nov. 29, 2023.

Somewhere along the way it all clicked for me. Advent is the time for me to reflect on all my longings, all my troubles, all the good things, all the hard things and wonder at the joy these things bring me in the end. Parenting is hard. Mom-ing is hard. Daughter-ing is hard. Sister-ing is hard. Marriage is hard. Teaching is hard. There are good moments and lots of not great moments, but in the end it all brings me joy. No wonder one of the candles we light is the candle of joy. And that is what Advent is all about. The coming of Christ. The coming of One who wants to bring us joy. The coming of One who wants to ease and redeem our suffering, not erase it. The coming of One who will lead us towards fuller hearts and fuller lives and be present with us in the making of those lives–the good, the bad, the ugly, and the beautiful.

So with a full heart, tomorrow I will turn towards Advent and Joy. I will stop waiting for the other shoe to drop (as my anxiety driven self frequently does) and just plain live out the joy of the moment. I will wait for the coming of all of our hopes and peace and love for the now and not yet with great joy.

Love Y’all, Marla